tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21193415144143070852024-03-05T15:41:33.541+00:00Breaking the RulesMisadventures of a girl next door...Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.comBlogger106125truetag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-77483672675697775682011-09-06T14:26:00.003+01:002011-09-06T14:46:56.042+01:00Lamenting the Loss of Lowewood...It's that time of year again - the leaves turn brown, the air turns colder and schoolgirls everywhere prepare for a new term. Since the Lowewood Academy finished a couple of years ago I have felt a pang of loss, there will be no new school year, no new lower sixth meandering their way into mischief and inevitably ending up bent over somebody's lap.For all those who miss the shenanigans that Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-35495722223343817092011-08-15T10:04:00.003+01:002011-08-15T10:53:55.031+01:00Cruisin' for a Bruising...For the last few months I've been AWOL from this blog, and quiet on other formerly frequent haunts across the kinkosphere. It's not that it's been a kink-free time completely; I could have written about what an amazing time I had at the Lowewood Academy boarding school weekend back in May, about beginning to dip my toes and make friends on the Australian scene or about starting to play with Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-78817389587403902582011-04-02T17:44:00.003+01:002011-04-02T18:03:20.854+01:00Ready or not?I've been somewhat silent for the last couple of months because there really is only so much you can say about feeling hurt and lost. Intentions to throw myself into the munches and clubs of Melbourne weren't quite followed through as I realised I needed to establish a normal life first (though I did meet a couple of lovely friends). Not to mention having spent five of the last six weeks abroadRebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-20729573676780758402011-02-13T12:10:00.003+00:002011-02-13T12:26:38.665+00:00Little VictoriesThis week has been a really hard week. For no real reason I've been exhausted, struggling to get out of bed in the morning and wanting nothing more than to collapse by the time 5 o'clock rolls around. Work has been incredibly stressful with a lot of uncertainty around whether or not I was heading off to Africa for weeks only resolved a few days before I fly. The novelty of being in a new Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-83170289598123037212011-02-06T12:06:00.003+00:002011-02-06T13:06:37.775+00:00More like meYesterday marked my first month in Australia - it certainly hasn't been plain sailing but there has been a lot of good. Am happily settled into my new flat, have met some lovely friends, joined a bookclub and work is keeping me very busy. It's really hard being so far away from family and friends, to miss exciting social events, giggling over a glass of wine or just being able to have a bit of Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-72983830886954022802011-01-19T14:38:00.004+00:002011-01-20T02:14:13.703+00:00All By MyselfI really am all by myself. My first two weeks down under have been something of a whirlwind - not many people succeed in needing emergency dental within 48 hours of arriving in a country! One wisdom tooth lighter (I never was very wise!) I've realised a few things about myself...- I'm actually quite good at looking after myself. Within 10 days of arriving I'd found and signed the lease on a Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-46773734937410622372010-12-27T16:54:00.004+00:002010-12-27T17:21:19.403+00:00With a little help from my friends...Just a quick post to say a massive thank you to all the friends who've held my hand through the last year and a bit and offered tea, cuddles and a shoulder to cry on when I've needed it, which has been quite a lot. I haven't blogged much for quite a while because frankly life has been mostly less than sparkly and too many 'feeling sad today' posts are very dull and very self indulgent. It's notRebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-42982862219162073522010-12-01T21:39:00.000+00:002010-12-01T21:40:18.040+00:00Less than 'me'<!--StartFragment--> I’ve been thinking a lot recently about headspace and bdsm and how it can make me feel. One thing I’ve realised is that although I love playing in the space where I’m riding the pain, there’s lots of banter and I’m quite ‘high’ sometimes I want something different. I want to be less than ‘me’. It’s odd but when I’m playing like that, not really feeling it when it hurts, Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-42343710148912339892010-09-13T20:56:00.002+01:002010-09-13T21:23:27.642+01:00Back to CollegeI go back to college on Thursday to study for a qualification I don't really want. Exams, assessments, homework, long Thursday evenings and Saturdays of studying something I don't *really* care about to be something I don't really want to be. Going back wasn't the easiest decision but however much I stamp my feet about it I *am* working in finance for now for very good reasons. And if I am Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-36493619512980561392010-07-12T23:17:00.004+01:002010-07-12T23:25:02.087+01:00Dashwood House...Look where I found on my travels...Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-60670584406213159092010-07-12T00:30:00.002+01:002010-07-12T00:54:06.632+01:00Corner Time"But you don't stand still...ever!"Was my best friend's confused comment as I tried to explain a little more about what I was 'into'. Some of what we do is difficult for vanillas to grasp, particularly when it's not especially sexual and falls more into the 'DS' than the 'B' or 'SM' aspects of what we do. We've been talking quite a lot about it recently - she's going through some hard times Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-777236149972826072010-06-27T20:10:00.002+01:002010-06-27T20:20:51.338+01:00Inappropriate...The hotel that we are hosting our annual workshop in is partly old and colonial, which has led to not a few inappropriate thoughts when the planning meetings get too stupefying. It's hardly fair to put me in a 150 year old colonial building that was originally a ballroom and is now used for conferences and to expect me to focus very well on presentations and the best position for the podium. MyRebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-40423460839217444422010-06-25T18:35:00.003+01:002010-06-25T18:49:26.197+01:00RenaissanceMy world is on the move again hopefully for the better. All going to plan I'm starting a new job in a couple of weeks and escaping my psycho boss. Am in Sri Lanka facilitating a 'final fling' workshop but mostly just wanting to go to the beach. Feeling more engaged with my dark and dirty side than I have for a while, mostly due to being generally unhappy and stressed out (hence the lack of Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-22302506675157534862010-05-13T00:32:00.002+01:002010-05-13T00:36:44.520+01:00Feeling confused...About what I want right now. The certain thing is more play - the boy interest is away, several play dates have been cancelled and work has been making it hard to get to clubs and events I'd like to attend. It almost feels as if the kink within and play-life that were blossoming a year ago have wilted away. I know why and don't like the reasons but they're hard to deal with. Part of me wants Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-49200021730005763162010-03-31T23:16:00.000+01:002010-03-31T23:16:10.868+01:00Everything I am...A teenager dreaming of faraway places or solemnly voicing ambitions to build schools and hospitals in Africa to a disbelieving PSE class whose desires rested upon flash cars and designer trainers.A school leaver singing a rainbow with coloured balloons teaching quechua children English in darkest Ecuador or trembling with excitement at riding in the back of a pick-up truck for the first time. Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-13113199580564955872010-03-17T21:59:00.004+00:002010-03-17T22:09:33.205+00:00Purple Thursday knickers...So this week didn't quite provoke the flurry of posting that I'd hoped for. In fact the outcome has been something a little akin to a non-kinky workhouse or sweatshop that has seen me toil for fifteen hours a day with little prospect of resolving half of the issues the team here are facing. Not that I haven't *had* kinky thoughts about living here in ancient times (the place has barely changed Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-44550042049013058662010-03-13T15:21:00.004+00:002010-03-13T15:42:44.566+00:00Middle Eastern ReformatoryI am on my travels with work again. Sitting in a distant hotel room as the Call to Prayer echoes out across the land. An ancient city surrounded by mountains full of places to inspire kinky thoughts in a girl like me. Work travel has the ability to be terribly isolating as you battle with strange menus, dodgy hotels and the knowledge that everyone back home is probably having a riot whilst youRebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-62834984597494089092010-02-21T18:05:00.002+00:002010-02-21T18:13:52.357+00:00Do they really notice...Or even care? 'They' being men in this case. Us girlies obviously spend a lot of time before a scene thinking about what we're going to wear, how to do our hair and which underwear will go best. Thing is I didn't use to spend quite long thinking about it - I had one set of black quite nice H&M bra and pants and the rest were plain cotton and slightly stretched. I have distinct memories ofRebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-44775524121446367292010-02-19T00:22:00.000+00:002010-02-19T00:22:42.426+00:00Strange moodI'm thinking about the Great Halls of ancient warriors. Braziers lit, ornate hangings on the wall, long feasting tables with wooden benches, probably a roast pig or four. A triumphant local Chieftain or petty King, probably some minstrels playing something warlike with lots of drums. One by one the hostages taken to ensure the good behaviour of the kingdoms he has defeated are presented to himRebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-37087658687225267532010-02-07T23:57:00.003+00:002010-02-08T00:33:39.598+00:00Sunday Night BluesI have the Sunday night blues, a bad case of them. No one likes Mondays but I don't remember the impending sense of doom hitting quite so brutally on Sunday nights a year or two ago. I'm happier in my job than I was back then (still frequently bored but at least it's worthwhile) and generally a pretty happy bunny so think it must be a bit of a reflection of the pattern that my life's taking Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-90251675274571994822010-02-05T16:13:00.000+00:002010-02-05T16:14:05.745+00:00Sweet girl, action girlA vanilla friend once jokingly said that my problem was that I wasn't sure if I wanted to be Lara Croft or Legally Blonde. At the time I was frantically trying on dresses for a black tie dinner in the forty minute gap between racing on the river and having to jump on a bus to go rock climbing for the weekend. The girly part of me demanded trying on virtually every dress in multiple shops Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-2953384854754356802010-01-26T16:59:00.001+00:002010-01-26T16:59:35.333+00:00Click ConundrumsWhen I talk about kink I talk a lot about the elusive ‘click’. Click is what makes you instantly warm to someone and thus find yourself giggling over your sixth cocktail and a plate of tapas hours into what was meant to be a quick drink. Or when you start chatting to someone and discover that you both stayed at the same backpackers’ hostel in a tiny African village, have a mutual obsession withRebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-36767607001676505032010-01-14T21:32:00.000+00:002010-01-14T21:33:55.185+00:00MermaidPearlescent, almost ethereal she lay,Dark hair pooling around her shoulders;Slight like silver birch or willow;Skin pale and perfect as a dove.She looked like a mermaid he’d saidThat first day they’d met in the rain,Struggling with a pile of library books;Damp hair whipping in her face. Tea in a non-descript caféWith chintzy cups and chipped plates,Scones with cream and raspberry jamAs red as Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-20192303870498264072010-01-08T21:50:00.000+00:002010-01-08T21:50:21.828+00:00The audition pt1Lavina fumbled nervously with the strings of her corset in dressing room, aware that she could hear him pacing impatiently next door. Although she had only just met Mr Thomas she already had the distinct impression that he was not the type of man who appreciated being kept waiting. She'd got that much from their conversation about her audition over the phone, three outfits, an address and the Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119341514414307085.post-20165171688618968412010-01-06T14:55:00.000+00:002010-01-06T14:55:40.051+00:00Memories...It's funny how the strangest of things can trigger memories. I was organising my underwear drawer (the one for normal underwear, not the one for super frilly tutu knickers, corsets, camisoles and babydolls - they share a separate drawer with my hair straighteners!) and the whole thing ended up making me feel quite nostalgic. You see, I almost threw away the knickers that I'd bought to do my Rebeccahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08928330882168974318noreply@blogger.com8